So many parents feel strongly that their children need to go to college when they finish high school, and they feel responsible for helping their children with college expenses.
I’m in favor of a college education for most people. That’s why I encouraged my children to pursue a college education when they had finished with high school.
I also felt very strongly that it was my responsibility to assist my children with the funding for college. I knew it was going to cause challenges for my finances, but that was secondary to my desire to help my children prepare for a successful adulthood.
First Child
We sent our oldest daughter to a private Christian university. She applied for a few scholarships, but wasn’t offered any assistance and gave up quickly. She applied for financial aid, and was offered guaranteed student loans…for about half of her school expenses. They expected her parents to cover the difference. That’s where I came in and stepped up to the plate.
She was at a university that I favored for her, so my only option was to divvy up. Because I hadn’t prepared ahead with any savings plan, it was up to me to take out parent loans to fulfill my “obligation”.
Second Child
My second daughter was a little easier on me. She chose to stay home and attend the local community college. She was working and could pay the tuition on her own. We were able to come up with a little money to help her purchase her books.
After two years, she moved to a town an hour away from us and finished her degree at a state university. It was cheaper than the private school, but still required that I take out more loans to cover my half.
Third Child
By this time I was maxed out in my ability to meet the minimum payments on all that I had borrowed. It was also about the time that my son had graduated from high school and was ready to start college.
We humbly told him that our credit was maxed out and we were unable to take out any debt to help him through college. It forced him to follow his second sister’s path through the community college and state university system.
My wife and I took on a weekly cleaning job at the beauty salon my wife worked at. It paid an extra $200 per month that went into a savings account for my son’s college expenses. Whenever he had a school bill to cover, we gave him what we had in that account.
We were fortunate that he earned a scholarship for his final two years’ tuition at the state university. Without that assistance, it would have been much more difficult for him to complete his bachelor’s program.
If I Could Do It All Over Again
Hindsight is always 20-20. Looking back, there are several things I would have done differently.
- I wouldn’t have taken on the parent loans.
- I would have put in more effort to build a savings for each of my children’s education.
- I would have taken on the side hustle much earlier. It wouldn’t have been enough to cover “my half” of the education bills, but it would have been helpful.
- I would have required that my children put more effort into applying for scholarship money.
- I would have expected my children to get a job and put some money toward their own education.
In the end, they all turned out fine. They are each successful in their own career choices. I’m very proud of each of their accomplishments.
The oldest has paid off her student loans, and the other two are working toward that goal. I, too, am very close to having all my parent loans cleaned up.